A Thousand Pound Eye Bags – Day 164, Never Give Up On Your Dreamz

Just a few months ago,
I was able to sit on this same chair,
Wide-eyed,
Energized for the peace and silence the day brings,
When I’ seated away from a glass house where a new shard cracks and falls each waking morning.
New poem in mind,
Ready for as many repititions it took for me to memorize,
But,
My eyelids feel heavier and heavier.
Nowadays,
I see darkness more often than I’d like rather than the bright,
Blue horizon for my front-row viewing pleasures.
Not emough energy to care for the beauty I’ve been desperate to see,
For years…
And,
Whom’s fault may that be?
Certaintly no one besides who I look at in a mirror I have a hard time staring into.
Where it’s my job,
And,
My job only,
To smile while no one else is sround.
My only question is,
What happens when you can’t?
When each facial muscle feels too weak to contract after a war against myself I’ve been severely wounded by?
Because,
I’m barely standing as I speak…
Where is God to finally uplift me?…