The Bill Of Love – No More Chemtrails pt. 3

Divine interventions illuminated truths I thought would never be.
Like,
Family broken by vice and dark synergies.
Sitting alone in a room knowing I’m hated while sifting through memories,
I’m begging to black out…

But,
It never works.
You know…
Rolling blunts,
Floating up on a cloud!
Trying to get away from demons following your path every you go…
Just for it to fade!
While you fall into territories unknown…

So,
How do I escape a home about to smolder into ash?
Sure,
A detonation may leave many pieces to put back together,
A puzzle I can solve without the Devil’s reign to wash away what can be made better,
But,
Alas!
My tears drip and extinguish embers I stare at,
Forcing my hand…

No other choice,
But,
To pack my bags,
Bolting away from a place where I’m not wanted.
A place where I went screws-loose over “profits,”
I couldn’t make for a woman God said would inflict more pain on my conscious.
A woman I can no longer look without wanting,
To dissolve in the ocean of suffering and loneliness I’ve adopted,
As the light I needed to see…

Because,
It doesn’t matter if my Mother doesn’t love me.
I’m done being called a faggot just for living with her as I lack money.
Love doesn’t cost a thing!
But,
The price I pay waiting for an empty soul to start loving,
What she brought into this wretched world?
Is the reason I lay broken while running,
From God’s grace and acceptance…

Why did she ever bother making me in the first place?
Trust me,
I will never get it…