Numbskullz

“Numbskull” is the result of a fool way too attentive to those who despise their existence and,
I find myself dealing with such circumstance.
More often than not,
My skull feels numb all throughout its left side and,
Makes me wonder why I even hurt myself by chasing those who let me slip from the edge while watching me hang on.
If I knew I’d just grow colder than ever,
Alone with no way to warm up except by the embers of a lit joint,
Maybe,
I would’ve just,
Loved myself much more than I do now.
Sure,
I love myself enough to keep away from any thought and decision that can compromise my life,
But,
Not enough to just,
Smile and feel at peace in the same moment.
A smile I raise when thinking of the hug I dream of every day that passes by,
Lowering itself the second it begins to make me,
Cry…