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I Don’t Belong, But I’m Here – Freewrite #41

Sunnier days have been looming ahead as I sit down and pour out my anxiety on to a notepad (unfortunately digital as I prefer the real thing, but too lazy I am today). I've been able to smile more regardless of any tumultuous situation. After trying to speed through life in my past days, knowing... Continue Reading →

Leaves of Peace

Finally!Finally,Finally.Surrounded by the kind of nature that loves to tell a story.Leaves of paper bound to a spine strong enough to endure what broke mine.Reminders of what life can be like if I just,Walk away from what wants to efface my existence on a planet I've grown weary of.All I wonder is,What's next?While my hands... Continue Reading →

You’re Not Alone!

"You're not alone!You're lovedYou're-" Sick of such a cliché thought anytime I reach out for a hand full of love.Love I know I've needed,But,Can't find the more I search for it in some weed and,A thought killing me the more I think about it as I lay down,Speechless… I mean,Why shouldn't I?Why shouldn't I join... Continue Reading →

Just Waiting To Die

Sometimes,All a person wants is to be acknowledged.With love and open arms from someone they've known for the longest.But,Life seems to go on without a single thought for me.Not a single person in my life that calls me to say,"Hi!How are you?Just to see how I am doing.Not a single hug to keep me from... Continue Reading →

Torrential Thoughts

What is life anymore?Is it a course of torment for the souls who mourn rest for most of their weary days?Or,Is there something at the end of our tunnels,Virtually endless,As we crawl on bleeding knees while laughed at for,Cringing in pain...Too hard to tell nowadays...

Will I Survive? 2..

"Brush the dirt off of your shoulders! Can't do nothin' else!" Others would tell me as frequently as possible, even if their shoulders are stained worse than mine can ever be. But, as much as I despise the phrase, I do regardless of what I am told. With hands still cut open by the jagged... Continue Reading →

Maybe That Is Why

Maybe that is why I've been having such a hard time.Feelings of rejection by an entire world I often despise,Yet,Love with all of my heart no matter how much I cry.I need someone to hug,But,I'm just not loved enough.What does one do when in need of the human touch,While labeled unworthy of it all because... Continue Reading →

Numbskullz

"Numbskull" is the result of a fool way too attentive to those who despise their existence and,I find myself dealing with such circumstance.More often than not,My skull feels numb all throughout its left side and,Makes me wonder why I even hurt myself by chasing those who let me slip from the edge while watching me... Continue Reading →

I Dine Alone

Thoughts I write up,Like day jobs and strike one.Batter's up,While I'm boxed in,On a search for diamonds without a need to buy one.I'm shining!Glass cups to my lightbulb while I light blunts.I'm dining alone with many knives,A,Will to survive with demons in mind,Who believe I should die!Regardless of all my beliefs in Christ... But,I let... Continue Reading →

Who Am I To Ever Love?

You know,I accept it.That I'm not worthy of love from another.I don't even care,I just,Want to play a video game without feeling guilty.Want to take a walk through a garden without past demons trying to fill me with doubt.I just,Want to look into my mirror and be fine with what's there,Entirely.Not just one or two... Continue Reading →

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