It’s just like me!
To start something and put it off until the next.
It’s not surprising!
How I’m already starting over with Day 1,
Again.
I challenged myself to write Poetry everyday,
But,
It became another promise my own demons sentenced to,
Death…
Nonetheless,
I’m still trying.
I’m still writing up another line,
Hard enough to punch through each wall in my head.
Not many choices to pick waking up from sleep I often wish was permanent,
Knowing only one is right if I am to endure throes of anger where I lay weedy instead of,
Envisioning thoughts pertinent to,
My much needed escape from these feelings of worthlessness…
But,
I must say.
This difficulty to rise is causing me indescribable pain.
I’m so lonely,
On most days I can’t take it,
So,
I force myself to believe that smoking is the only way.
Even if I get so clouded I can’t see my sobbing face,
In a mirror I get more tempted to break!
With each passing second.
How can you as a man existing in a world where rejection is a trend,
For men under the grips of depression treated as a financial benefit!
“If you need help,
Just see a therapist!”
Is what I’m left with along a chance to delude my mind with all kinds of prescriptions.
If I were to speak on my open wounds,
Most act as if they’ll get infected with what has restricted!
My face from a smile I desire…
So,
Here I am with another stanza I hope would retire,
What’s had my body worked up over senseless desires that tired,
My mind so often.
Looking for new wheels for each one I lost in,
A glass home I’ve been trying to walk through without getting cut by…
m3l0dicverse 
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