In a state of Saudade,
Longing its touch while I’m befogged in Earth’s ramada.
Faith seems to be lost at times,
Still I mound each of its problems on my fragile back,
No reward expected,
From Humans as fragile as I…
I need to be embraced,
I do feel as if I’m loved like any other.
Staring into my bathroom mirror,
I see probable cause to be punished…
I stare at a monster unseen like the lockness.
I’m prompted to swipe back.
Crack glass shards till its image is far from visible.
With minimal vision,
I envision what I can become.
Myself have begun…
No full moons as I howl,
From the bottom of my bowls…
What for though?
I don’t know,
Like a caveman shockingly glaring at his unfamiliar surroundings,
A wild where I step gently.
Thinking if I’m kind as some say,
How can my environment be malicious?
Exploring such land allowing me to walk across its very foundation,
My hopes for peace rip into thousands of pieces,
With every kill witnessed…
Block huggers welcoming lost souls with open arms.
Barbie dolls walking with hair that isn’t theirs.
Neighborhood thieves swiping purses versus working hard.
Thugs who blow kisses of death and don’t tell…
It’s damn near omniscient,
Where I’m from…
All apparent because of daily narratives that sound exactly the same.
And it never will…”
What if it was different?
I used to believe that nobody was there for me,
Then I realized I wasn’t there for myself.
Is diseased by self-centeredness over Fear,
Love is hard for most,
How can one portray that love onto another’s blank canvas,
When their canvas is blank as well?
I digressed from a loneliness made definitive by a mindset…
I look into the mirror nowadays,
And feel forgiven…
Hoping others will follow foot and love themselves much more.
When you realize love within yourself,
You can give some love back…