"I coin a phrase, For me to change, And pay for my sinz…" – m3l0dic
What is life anymore?Is it a course of torment for the souls who mourn rest for most of their weary days?Or,Is there something at the end of our tunnels,Virtually endless,As we crawl on bleeding knees while laughed at for,Cringing in pain...Too hard to tell nowadays...
"Brush the dirt off of your shoulders! Can't do nothin' else!" Others would tell me as frequently as possible, even if their shoulders are stained worse than mine can ever be. But, as much as I despise the phrase, I do regardless of what I am told. With hands still cut open by the jagged... Continue Reading →
Maybe that is why I've been having such a hard time.Feelings of rejection by an entire world I often despise,Yet,Love with all of my heart no matter how much I cry.I need someone to hug,But,I'm just not loved enough.What does one do when in need of the human touch,While labeled unworthy of it all because... Continue Reading →
"Numbskull" is the result of a fool way too attentive to those who despise their existence and,I find myself dealing with such circumstance.More often than not,My skull feels numb all throughout its left side and,Makes me wonder why I even hurt myself by chasing those who let me slip from the edge while watching me... Continue Reading →
Thoughts I write up,Like day jobs and strike one.Batter's up,While I'm boxed in,On a search for diamonds without a need to buy one.I'm shining!Glass cups to my lightbulb while I light blunts.I'm dining alone with many knives,A,Will to survive with demons in mind,Who believe I should die!Regardless of all my beliefs in Christ... But,I let... Continue Reading →
You know,I accept it.That I'm not worthy of love from another.I don't even care,I just,Want to play a video game without feeling guilty.Want to take a walk through a garden without past demons trying to fill me with doubt.I just,Want to look into my mirror and be fine with what's there,Entirely.Not just one or two... Continue Reading →
Loved.To be loved,Is all I desire.My only question is,If I truly did love myself,Would I be feeling this way in the first place? I only ask because,Remembering the last time I've heard those magical three words our hearts melt over is quite difficult.Not a single thought bubble sprouting above my head with a memory,No image... Continue Reading →
So weird,Writing this piece during my recovery.Because,I've lived a life rife with mistakes I'm trying to right before I'm dead,In a grave,With no chance to rebuttal each critic of my existence.And,I can't use a voice I've seemed to have burned out by belching complaint after complaint from the top of my lungs.All over anger and... Continue Reading →
Imagine being the guy no one reaches out to.The guy everybody ignores anytime there's a holiday,Even if it is his birthday too.How awful it feels to be forgotten.How daunting it is to be wrong in the eyes of every who used to love you… Heartbreaking,Yes!But,That's me.A reality I've had to let sink and fill my... Continue Reading →
“Just do it…Just quit.” Says the voice in my head every time I set fire to another blunt. On most days, it feels like I’m setting fire to my own situation. No longer a joy as it was in the past. Sure, cannabis can be mind-blowing for some of us. But, in a world that... Continue Reading →
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