"I coin a phrase, For me to change, And pay for my sinz…" – m3l0dic
Nobody loves me,But,I'm okay with knowing that.Because,God seems present in my life while gifting me a pen and pad.A pen and pad I could talk to any time I feel sad.A place where I could be honest.A place where I can admit how I want to die and get off this,Earth that doesn't feel like... Continue Reading →
Blood, water, and bacteria amongst many other elements you can think of, we're made up of it. Doesn't matter how you slice and place it within a petri dish we're forced to call Earth, Home, however you want to address this ball of dirt we just happen to be on. And, as much attention I... Continue Reading →
Family wouldn't make it a point to remind you how no one cares for your existence.Family would never cross lines you've set in sand to thwart off all kinds of maliciousness.Family would sooth your battle scars after every hit and miss,Regardless if you're wrong or right in whatever position you're in.So…Where was mine as my... Continue Reading →
Florescent scents from our carousing days,Pervade my nose when thinking of a Rose I've plucked and,Let die.A Rose my heart held as a symbol of love,Now dead because of faith she couldn't see when looking into my watery eyes… And,It took a while to grow past the pain of Her loss,As my sunshine dimmed the... Continue Reading →
Train rides back home became difficult for me.Feels like I have no where to go as I enter a room humid even when it isn't stormy.I try to flick away the thought of being lonely,But,I suffocate in it and end up having fits,Asphyxiating over sentences that run on with a hitch,Common within most I spew…... Continue Reading →
Waking up everyday knowing that no one will ever just, say Hi, is probably the toughest reality to wake up to. From what I've seen, rich or poor, Loneliness is powerful enough to devour your entire soul, spitting it back out onto concrete where the sun shines the brightest. A beast I've known too well,... Continue Reading →
"You're not alone!You're lovedYou're-" Sick of such a cliché thought anytime I reach out for a hand full of love.Love I know I've needed,But,Can't find the more I search for it in some weed and,A thought killing me the more I think about it as I lay down,Speechless… I mean,Why shouldn't I?Why shouldn't I join... Continue Reading →
Sometimes,I get so busy trying to find something,That I forget I already found something.A confusion making me sick with beliefs my inner child chooses not to believe.Like,Having no one to hold for the rest of my days,Even if it seemed as such.Until I realized what was in front of me for so long as I... Continue Reading →
Honestly,Writing’s been quite different ever since I began my journey to sobriety.A journey where I don’t half-ass it like I’ve been for the past couple of years.Smoking my troubles away,As soon as I feel any kind of pain,While repeating to myself,“Today will be the day!”Yet,Can’t find the courage to ever let Mary Jane go.Even if... Continue Reading →
Thoughts I write up,Like day jobs and strike one.Batter's up,While I'm boxed in,On a search for diamonds without a need to buy one.I'm shining!Glass cups to my lightbulb while I light blunts.I'm dining alone with many knives,A,Will to survive with demons in mind,Who believe I should die!Regardless of all my beliefs in Christ... But,I let... Continue Reading →
m3l0dicverse 