Absentminded

Maybe it’s just, a moment of confusion. Maybe, this is a nightmare and it’s quite lucid.

With how intrusive such darkness has become, I often ponder what my absence would’ve been like since the moment my life had begun.

Many more smiles. So many get-togethers worthwhile. Freedom from yearning my death as I begin a new life cycle…

Being on the sidelines, it’s hard to think of anything else, even if you’ve made it out of your own Hell. But, in rising from perdition, not a loved one in sight? The past is something I refuse to dwell in…

Because, I cry. Here and there. And still smile at the end of it . I may not know why, but, if God has allowed me to grin regardless if it’s one second, there has to be reason I can find as to why I’m still present…